Be a fountain, not a drain.

Can I just say how RUDE I think it is when I am talking to someone, and their significant other stares off into space with a look of utter boredom on their face, as if they are barely tolerating the inconvenience?!

More than once recently, I have seen an old friend with their girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife who I don't particularly know. Rather than that person making eye-contact, or listening, or even--gasp--participating in the conversation, they hang on the arm of their other half, and watch the grocery checker ring up customers, instead of talking to me. It's as if they say to themselves, "Oh, it's Schnookem's friend, nobody important, not one of my friends, I guess I'll just have to stand here and wait until they stop talking, I do wish they'd hurry it up." How ungracious is that? In fact, I consider it a sign that my friend is dating/married to an idiot. An immature idiot who is grossly lacking in social graces. By contrast, I'm always delighted to discover a friend whose significant other is friendly and engaging.

Call me old-fashioned, but I actually want to get to know the friends and family of those who I date. Odd, huh? I have really appreciated the in-laws in my family who make an effort to have a relationship with me and find out a little bit about what's going on in my life. The in-laws who are not very friendly are sort of metaphorical drains rather than fountains at family functions. And they too have that expression of detachment, and seem to tug at the sleeves of their spouse, as if to say "Can we pleeease go yet?" They don't seem to have very much fun, and they aren't much fun to be around, which is a pity, because it doesn't have to be that way.

So there you have it! If your honey passes the "I am polite/not self-absorbed enough to converse with my sweetie's friends, family, and acquaintances" test, it doesn't guarantee that you're not dating an unmannered egotist, but if they fail the test, at least I think it's a pretty good indicator that they might be...

Mary's Little Donkey and The Flight to Egypt

When I was a about nine or so, my aunt gave my mom a book called, "Mary's Little Donkey and the Flight to Egypt" by Gunhild Sehlin, a Swedish author. It is a wonderful Christmas story to read to young children! I loved it as a kid, and I just pulled it out again to read to the little boy I tutor-- he loved it as well! This is a great book to add to your collection, or give as a gift. It is a bit difficult to find, since it is a "foreign" book, and the English translation is mostly sold in the UK, but I found several places where it could be ordered online. It's a little late for me to be posting this for Christmas, but it's really a story that could be used at any time of year. The story is interesting and sweet, and it was all I could do not to cry three or four times as I was reading it out loud. (I wonder if my pupil noticed the crack in my voice each time.) I highly, highly recommend it as one of my favorite Children's books.

Short Synopsis from Floris books:
"The stubborn, dirty little donkey who is of no use to anyone in Nazareth becomes a quick and willing helper under Mary’s care. The other animals in Mary's stable like him and together they wait for the birth of Mary's child.

But Mary and Joseph have to leave Nazareth obeying Caesar's decree, and the donkey carries Mary to Bethlehem where the child is born.
The donkey hopes to carry Mary and her son quickly back to Nazareth but instead they have to flee to far-away Egypt. Willingly, the donkey makes this journey through the desert. Only after a long time could they return home where the other animals in Mary's stable welcome them.

An engaging alternative to the traditional Christmas story, to be read to children age 6-8, or for children age 8-10 to read to themselves."

"There goes your first date..."

My favorite M&M commercial. I get a kick out of my name being used in it. ;)